Parting with the family home

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I was a college student when my parents announced to me and my three brothers that they were selling our house. I had lived since age six in this home up the Chambers Street hill in south Eugene. Upon hearing the news, I remember telling my mom that they may as well sell Christmas, too, because selling that house was basically ending my childhood story. Ouch! I was naïve to think that their life began and ended with me and my brothers. Apparently, there is life after kids. My parents were determined to find a home that locked-step with their new lifestyle going forward.

My parents had provided us children a spacious home on a dead-end street at the edge of town. By the date of my parents’ announcement, we had all moved out, leaving the two of them rattling around a much bigger space than they needed or used. Bedrooms became expensive storage units for our childhood “treasures.”

Homes are much more than “sticks and bricks.” Inside the home’s walls we come together and stay together with those we love the most. Memories attach themselves to our homes. Our daily rituals play out, as do our most significant life benchmarks, within the walls of our home. When you choose your home you also choose your neighborhood, your children’s schools, your commute to work, and even the grocery store and gas station that you frequent.

The thought of changing homes is scary. This may be why many people are housed in homes that no longer serve their lifestyles. And so, a gardener is hired to help manage the yard, and a house cleaner is hired to dust what cannot be reached. The upstairs rooms are staged for guests and closed off so that the furnace will not overwork to heat unused space.

It’s OK, for now. The good news is that many homeowners making this choice have low mortgages, or their home is free and clear. There is no financial urgency.

Despite my pleas, my parents moved on to a one-level home with a great-room floor plan. They went up the McKenzie River – but not too far out. It offered a lovely guest room. My parents chose this home for themselves. The requirement of providing for their children was no longer a concern. I am proud of them. And the memories we built in their McKenzie River home were priceless, too. My girls spent every Friday at their home for years. The crazy thing is that today, I find myself in the same position as my parents. My daughters have launched. And I sit in a 3,000 sq. ft. house – with the gardener, the house cleaner and the zonal heat plan!

It may be time for me to look at my next adventure. It may be time for you to look for your next adventure. This begins with building a vision. It is impossible to let go of the security of a “pretty good thing” until you have a clear vision of a really great thing.

First, look at where you spend your time in your current home. Consider also where you do not spend time. Your next home needs more of what you use and enjoy and less of what you don’t.

Second, consider what your interests and needs are and how your next home will support that. For example, I intend to travel, therefore a high maintenance or oversized yard makes no sense. However, I do like to host patio barbecues, so some outdoor living is important.

Third, explore! Give me a call and let’s go look for homes/condos or assisted living that fit you now. The world is our oyster. This is a time of great discovery.

Finally, recognize that the release of your current home is emotionally and logistically significant. It is time for a new family to create memories in your space. The logistics are manageable once you have confidence in your plan. Don’t hesitate to get support for this significant transition. I would be happy to refer you to experts in every step of the process.

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If you have any questions about buying or selling smart, or if you’d like to interview me regarding my real estate services in Lane County, please contact me.