You Buy a House; You Sell a Home. An experienced Realtor will help you navigate the emotional and logical influences that rise to the surface when you work through managing one of your largest investments.
As I walk through a home, prior to listing it for a seller, the homeowners often share with me how they have made memories and lived in the home over the years: “One year, we had fourteen people squeezed around this dining room table on Christmas eve.”
“The morning sun pours through the French doors in our master bedroom. You can always find our tomcat enjoying the warmth.”
“I know that you will tell us to paint over this wall where we measured our kids’ heights over the years. We will. It’s just sort of hard…” Your house has become more than just an investment. It is your home, and you’ve created heart-centered memories in the space. When it is time to sell, however, you’ll need to put your head into the game and let go a little. This is easier said than done, I know!
As a Realtor, I’m in a unique position to watch buyers and sellers navigate between the emotional and logical forces in the home buying or selling process. To the buyer, the home purchase is likely to be the most
significant purchase of their lifetime. We recognize that logic and critical thinking is vital. We also know that how a home feels is the greatest influence in the buying decision. As a recent buyer-client said, ‘when you find the right house, you just know it. It feels right.’
Buyers often end up purchasing a home that is very different than what they had described on their wish-list at the beginning of their search. This is a great testimony to the significance of intuition, emotion, and gut-checks during the home buying process. In the industry, the tongue-in-cheek phrase ‘buyers are liars’ is in reference to how buyers may say that they must have three bedrooms and one level, but then they turn around and buy a tri-level, two-bedroom house.
The buyers are not intentionally deceptive. The search for a home begins with a list of perceived requirements of their dream house, as it should. Often though, it turns out that what ends up being most important wasn’t even on their original wish-list. Sometimes it’s that gut feeling a buyer gets when they walk in the door that makes the sale. To help bridge this gap between the heart and head, consider adding a step to your home shopping plan. Once you have created your initial list of home features, think about why each feature is important to you. This will help you think more logically and rationalize your options throughout your search.
For example, your heart may want a medium to large lot which will offer the privacy. Or you may require at least three bedrooms because you want a master bedroom, a guest bedroom and a den/home office. Allow your head to open to the possibility that the need for the privacy could be filled with a home that backs to forest, park or even a neighbors’ deep backyard, even if the lot size is minimal. And maybe the
third space for the den/home office can be achieved by creating an office nook in a loft or bonus room. Buying a home is the beginning of creating a new phase of life, and new memories.
You often choose a home because it checked all the boxes on your wish list. Does it have enough bedrooms and baths, a good-sized yard and it is located only ten minutes from work? Check! Now, how does the home feel, does the floor-plan wrap nicely around your lifestyle? Will it ‘fit your family’s changing needs over the next 5-10 years?
If it helps, think of it this way: a home is your family’s nest, your safe place. A house is a place to ‘house’ your stuff. When you’ve built your life and your memories in that home, selling can be like a tough break-up – if you let it. Instead, try to separate your ‘heart’ home from your ‘head’ house. Cherish the memories. Take a picture of the many years of kid’s heights measured on the wall, and then paint it over for the next family to add their hearts to the home.